Today, I have made a promise to me. I have made a commitment to myself. I will keep it.
You see, I am my own worst enemy. I am the first person to criticize or condemn myself, my actions, and my abilities. I know where my weaknesses lie and I will point them out and exploit them, even when others fail to see them. I agonize over mistakes, and I confess, if not out loud, then silently, just how stupid those mistakes are.
At least, I would do that. Not anymore, however. Starting today, I am going to be my very best friend. I am going to be my number one cheerleader and supporter. I am going to praise my achievements and accomplishments. I am going to stand on success and strength.
No, I'm not going to be egotistical and prideful. I am, however, going to accept that I have value and worth. I am going to recognize that I have importance and can positively contribute to the lives of those around me.
How am I going to make these changes? Really, quite simply. I am rewriting my personal dictionary. Instead of including the terms "I can't"; "I'm not"; "I don't"; my personal descriptive dictionary will contain the phrases I can, I am, and I will.
For you see "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me", Philippians 4:13. Not only that, but, "I am fearfully and wonderfully made", according to Psalm 139:14. "I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust." Psalm 91:2.
Yes, starting today, I have made a promise to me. I will remember that this life is not about me. It is about what He has done for me. This life is not about what I can accomplish, but about what He can accomplish through me. It is not by my strength or by my might, but by His stripes. I was created in the image of God and starting today, I will not condemn Gods creation. In all things I will praise Him, for He lives in me. With Him alive within me, how can I possibly criticize me?
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Beginning Again
Wow! It's hard to believe in just a couple of days we will be ushering in the year 2010. I look back at my life and wonder just where the time went.
Where is that little blond girl who was so shy and quite? Anyone who knows me now surely thinks I am not describing myself with that sentence. I am not blond (except for those streaks I occasionally add from a box) and I am anything but quite. It is hard to believe that the woman I am today is the same little girl who would hide under the stove or behind Mamas legs as a child. Yes, I am very different person now than I was then.
What about that young girl who spent her days roaming around the farm? Nothing was better than a hot summers day running through the woods, exploring trails and seeking treasures. That girl still exist inside of me. I still love a long walk through the cool woods on a hot day. I can still sit for hours dipping my feet in a cool stream while becoming lost in the story found in a good book. I am still fascinated by the birds, squirrels and other wildlife found out and about in nature.
Often I wonder whatever happened to that teenage girl who would be lost in dreams while watching the clouds float by. There were so many dreams, so many things to accomplish, things to do, places to visit. Where did all the time go?
It appears I got so caught up in living everyday life that I forgot to live life everyday. I know, sounds confusing huh? I mean, if your busy living life everyday, how can you forget to live life? Easy! Really, really easy!
So often we go through the motions of our everyday life. We get up and get busy. We have that daily routine regardless of the life we have. We get the kids off to school, we get ready for work, drive that long commute, handle all the task we have to handle, rush back home get dinner, do evening chores then its off to bed. Next morning, we're up and at it again - same routine, different day. We live everyday life without living life everyday.
Today, I challenge you to live life, to really live life. Take a minute right now and just stop. Thats right, stop reading for a full sixty seconds. During that time ask yourself this question - "If I knew for a fact that tonight when I closed my eyes it would be for the very last time, what would be my biggest regret"? Well, do you have an answer? If so, take the time now to set the steps in motion to insure that regret doesn't come to pass.
Your regret may be a biggy - something like not visiting that country you always wanted to see, or maybe not finishing college, or not staying connected with that old friend. It may be something simple, like not calling your sister or not holding your husbands hand during that evening stroll. Whatever it will be, change it now. Start checking prices for that trip. Get all the facts together and once you know the cost (and it may not be as expensive as you think), divide the cost by the number 52. Then every Monday put that amount into a separate account, just for your trip. You'd be surprised at how fast it will add up, and at how easy a few cut corners will make achieving the goal possible. Pick up the phone and call your sister, or daughter, or husband or friend. Take a minute right now just to say I love you. Tonight, when you tuck those kids into bed, climb up on the bed with them. Prop up against the headboard and hold them close. Take a minute and ask how their day was, what was the thing they enjoyed the most, what was the most special part. You might just be surprised when they answer "doing this right now". Live Life Everyday, don't just live life daily.
In just a little more than 24 hours we will rush in the year 2010. Make this the year you start living life again. Have a Happy New Year!
Where is that little blond girl who was so shy and quite? Anyone who knows me now surely thinks I am not describing myself with that sentence. I am not blond (except for those streaks I occasionally add from a box) and I am anything but quite. It is hard to believe that the woman I am today is the same little girl who would hide under the stove or behind Mamas legs as a child. Yes, I am very different person now than I was then.
What about that young girl who spent her days roaming around the farm? Nothing was better than a hot summers day running through the woods, exploring trails and seeking treasures. That girl still exist inside of me. I still love a long walk through the cool woods on a hot day. I can still sit for hours dipping my feet in a cool stream while becoming lost in the story found in a good book. I am still fascinated by the birds, squirrels and other wildlife found out and about in nature.
Often I wonder whatever happened to that teenage girl who would be lost in dreams while watching the clouds float by. There were so many dreams, so many things to accomplish, things to do, places to visit. Where did all the time go?
It appears I got so caught up in living everyday life that I forgot to live life everyday. I know, sounds confusing huh? I mean, if your busy living life everyday, how can you forget to live life? Easy! Really, really easy!
So often we go through the motions of our everyday life. We get up and get busy. We have that daily routine regardless of the life we have. We get the kids off to school, we get ready for work, drive that long commute, handle all the task we have to handle, rush back home get dinner, do evening chores then its off to bed. Next morning, we're up and at it again - same routine, different day. We live everyday life without living life everyday.
Today, I challenge you to live life, to really live life. Take a minute right now and just stop. Thats right, stop reading for a full sixty seconds. During that time ask yourself this question - "If I knew for a fact that tonight when I closed my eyes it would be for the very last time, what would be my biggest regret"? Well, do you have an answer? If so, take the time now to set the steps in motion to insure that regret doesn't come to pass.
Your regret may be a biggy - something like not visiting that country you always wanted to see, or maybe not finishing college, or not staying connected with that old friend. It may be something simple, like not calling your sister or not holding your husbands hand during that evening stroll. Whatever it will be, change it now. Start checking prices for that trip. Get all the facts together and once you know the cost (and it may not be as expensive as you think), divide the cost by the number 52. Then every Monday put that amount into a separate account, just for your trip. You'd be surprised at how fast it will add up, and at how easy a few cut corners will make achieving the goal possible. Pick up the phone and call your sister, or daughter, or husband or friend. Take a minute right now just to say I love you. Tonight, when you tuck those kids into bed, climb up on the bed with them. Prop up against the headboard and hold them close. Take a minute and ask how their day was, what was the thing they enjoyed the most, what was the most special part. You might just be surprised when they answer "doing this right now". Live Life Everyday, don't just live life daily.
In just a little more than 24 hours we will rush in the year 2010. Make this the year you start living life again. Have a Happy New Year!
Thursday, December 17, 2009
The Merry-Go-Round
It seems there is nothing quite so fascinating as a merry-go-round. The beautiful carved horses, the flashing lights, the sparkling mirrors all combine together with that special music to delight the senses of children and adults alike.
I remember standing in line by my mother, watching the merry-go-round circle and circle, as I anxiously waited my turn to ride. With each pass of my favorite horse the excitement seemed to expand within me like air expanding with heat inside a hot-air balloon. There were times I was sure I was just going to explode with excitement before I could finally get my turn to ride. Once seated upon my horse, I would be almost bouncing from the sheer joy of sitting there. Then, it started. Around and around we would go. Up and down the horse would travel upon the pole. Seeing all the smiling faces as we circled round and round. Oh the joy, the freedom of racing in the wind upon that magical carousel.
I remember seeing that same expression of joy upon the faces of my children as they took their turn upon the merry-go-round. The excitement building as they watched while waiting their turn. Picking out their favorite horse and hoping against hope that none of the children in line ahead of them got to it first. Seeing the smiles light up their face as they climbed aboard their handsome steed. What a joyous time riding on the merry-go-round. I don’t believe this same pleasure can be found elsewhere. Only that special time on a merry-go-round will produce that particular feeling of excitement and joy.
Often, while standing in line, I would hear the sounds from a child whose perspective was a bit different than my own. Instead of excitement and joy, the merry-go-round would provoke feelings of fear and dread. Instead of laughing, this particular child would cry, holding onto the security of their parent or loved one. As a child, I never understood how something so magical and magnificent could cause a child to be afraid. After all, the merry-go-round was an exhilarating ride of joy that never lasted nearly long enough. Why did they cry? What made them afraid?
As an adult I have had occasion to experience rides upon life’s merry-go-round. Often these rides have been times of joy; flying through time, feeling the exhilaration I felt as a child. Other times, however, the ride wasn’t quite so magical. There have been times when lifes problems seem to turn the merry-go-round from a place of magic and lights, to a place of mischief and evil; a place from which I could not escape. The ride seemed like it would never end. The lifts and dips of my favorite horse upon its pole became high cliffs and plunging downfalls. Instead of circling joyfully, the ride seemed as if it was a constant, ceaseless motion. No ground was ever gained. I could not catch the other horses ahead and I could not stop because of the horses following so close upon my heels. I had no where to turn and no way off.
It was during those times that I would remember the other children. The ones who were afraid and instead of jumping up on the carnival ride, they clung desperately to their parents for safety. Yes, it was during those times that I felt the need to also cling to my Father.
Oh what a feeling to be able to reach out my arms and feel Him wrap His strong arms around me. He would gently lift me up and hold me close. Although lifes problems did not immediately go away, by turning to my Father, the merry-go-round did begin to slow. The cliffs were not so high and the drop down was gentle and easy. All because I turned to my heavenly Father and let Him take the reins.
So, the next time you find yourself chained to the merry-go-round of life, with all of it’s problems blocking your way and closing in, remember you are not alone. Your Father is right there with you and He will not let you go. Hold on tight to Him and He will hold you tightly to Him.
“It is GOD who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect.” 2 Samuel 22:23
I remember standing in line by my mother, watching the merry-go-round circle and circle, as I anxiously waited my turn to ride. With each pass of my favorite horse the excitement seemed to expand within me like air expanding with heat inside a hot-air balloon. There were times I was sure I was just going to explode with excitement before I could finally get my turn to ride. Once seated upon my horse, I would be almost bouncing from the sheer joy of sitting there. Then, it started. Around and around we would go. Up and down the horse would travel upon the pole. Seeing all the smiling faces as we circled round and round. Oh the joy, the freedom of racing in the wind upon that magical carousel.
I remember seeing that same expression of joy upon the faces of my children as they took their turn upon the merry-go-round. The excitement building as they watched while waiting their turn. Picking out their favorite horse and hoping against hope that none of the children in line ahead of them got to it first. Seeing the smiles light up their face as they climbed aboard their handsome steed. What a joyous time riding on the merry-go-round. I don’t believe this same pleasure can be found elsewhere. Only that special time on a merry-go-round will produce that particular feeling of excitement and joy.
Often, while standing in line, I would hear the sounds from a child whose perspective was a bit different than my own. Instead of excitement and joy, the merry-go-round would provoke feelings of fear and dread. Instead of laughing, this particular child would cry, holding onto the security of their parent or loved one. As a child, I never understood how something so magical and magnificent could cause a child to be afraid. After all, the merry-go-round was an exhilarating ride of joy that never lasted nearly long enough. Why did they cry? What made them afraid?
As an adult I have had occasion to experience rides upon life’s merry-go-round. Often these rides have been times of joy; flying through time, feeling the exhilaration I felt as a child. Other times, however, the ride wasn’t quite so magical. There have been times when lifes problems seem to turn the merry-go-round from a place of magic and lights, to a place of mischief and evil; a place from which I could not escape. The ride seemed like it would never end. The lifts and dips of my favorite horse upon its pole became high cliffs and plunging downfalls. Instead of circling joyfully, the ride seemed as if it was a constant, ceaseless motion. No ground was ever gained. I could not catch the other horses ahead and I could not stop because of the horses following so close upon my heels. I had no where to turn and no way off.
It was during those times that I would remember the other children. The ones who were afraid and instead of jumping up on the carnival ride, they clung desperately to their parents for safety. Yes, it was during those times that I felt the need to also cling to my Father.
Oh what a feeling to be able to reach out my arms and feel Him wrap His strong arms around me. He would gently lift me up and hold me close. Although lifes problems did not immediately go away, by turning to my Father, the merry-go-round did begin to slow. The cliffs were not so high and the drop down was gentle and easy. All because I turned to my heavenly Father and let Him take the reins.
So, the next time you find yourself chained to the merry-go-round of life, with all of it’s problems blocking your way and closing in, remember you are not alone. Your Father is right there with you and He will not let you go. Hold on tight to Him and He will hold you tightly to Him.
“It is GOD who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect.” 2 Samuel 22:23
For My Friends
If I could walk the way of dreams,
What joy would the future bring?
Would I find friendships anew,
Or would I long for times with you?
If I could take my steps in reverse,
What things in my life would be transferred?
Would I still be the woman I've become,
Or would my whole life be undone?
They say that life is a winding road,
With no one knowing which way it goes.
And in this life we don't get to choose,
The times we win nor the times we lose.
But I know if I could go through it again,
In my new life you'd still be my friend.
I'd give thanks for you everyday,
And in my life you'd always stay.
What joy would the future bring?
Would I find friendships anew,
Or would I long for times with you?
If I could take my steps in reverse,
What things in my life would be transferred?
Would I still be the woman I've become,
Or would my whole life be undone?
They say that life is a winding road,
With no one knowing which way it goes.
And in this life we don't get to choose,
The times we win nor the times we lose.
But I know if I could go through it again,
In my new life you'd still be my friend.
I'd give thanks for you everyday,
And in my life you'd always stay.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Awesome Songs with Special Meaning For Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GP7FY_IZmU
Till We Ain't Strangers Anymore
Jon Bon Jovi and LeAnn Rimes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB7T3lJ3dZ4
Need You Now
Lady Antebellum
Till We Ain't Strangers Anymore
Jon Bon Jovi and LeAnn Rimes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB7T3lJ3dZ4
Need You Now
Lady Antebellum
Darkness
"Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters." Genesis 1:2
I have experienced days of darkness; times when no light could reach the depths of my soul. These have not been pleasant times. They have been painfully devastating, leaving me feeling hopeless, alone, and afraid.
I experienced these days in childhood, after 'losing' my natural parents. As young as I was, I knew things had changed and would never be the same. I knew days of fear, wondering what would happen to me. I experienced times of unrest, wondering if I would be left again. I was afraid of being alone, afraid of not being wanted.
I experienced days of darkness as a teenager, trying to fit in. I moved a lot during my high school years and changed schools quite often. In reality I was a very shy, timid girl. I tried to hide that by being loud, often obnoxious. I wasn't really smart, nor was I really pretty. I had no visible talents to speak of, so it was very difficult for me to make friends. So even though I acted happy and cheerful, inside I was sad, alone, depressed. I often wondered why I wasn't good enough, why I wasn't acceptable, why I wasn't loved.
As an adult, I have experienced days of darkness hovering over me. There have been times I have made choices I have come to regret. There have been times I allowed my insecurities to take control, convincing me for the millionth time that I wasn't good enough; I wasn't pretty enough; I didn't measure up to those around me. There have been times sin has taken control of my life, blocking the light of grace.
It comforts me to know that all throughout my life - each and every time I have faced the darkness, God has hovered above the darkness. He has been right there watching over me, seeing the formless empty darkness that spread deep into the recesses of my soul.
"And God said 'Let there be light' and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness." Genesis 1: 3,4
Just as God spoke to the darkness hovering over the waters and brought the earth into light, God spoke to the darkness in my soul and brought me into the light. He lifted me from my dark pits of despair and allowed me to see the light of His love and grace. He separated my darkness with His light.
Notice God did not destroy the darkness. He did not banish it completely. He separated it by the power of His Word. Just as God separated the light of the day from the darkness of the night, He separated my darkness of fear, unworthiness, and unloveableness with His strength, His worth, and His love.
Throughout life I will still experience times of darkness. I will still experience times of fear. I will still experience times of loss. There will still be times that the scared little girl will have to face the darkness. And each time, God will still speak and at His Word, there will be light. So no matter what I face, no matter how difficult the situation, no matter how hurt or afraid, I will have the power of Gods light to separate me from the darkness.
I have experienced days of darkness; times when no light could reach the depths of my soul. These have not been pleasant times. They have been painfully devastating, leaving me feeling hopeless, alone, and afraid.
I experienced these days in childhood, after 'losing' my natural parents. As young as I was, I knew things had changed and would never be the same. I knew days of fear, wondering what would happen to me. I experienced times of unrest, wondering if I would be left again. I was afraid of being alone, afraid of not being wanted.
I experienced days of darkness as a teenager, trying to fit in. I moved a lot during my high school years and changed schools quite often. In reality I was a very shy, timid girl. I tried to hide that by being loud, often obnoxious. I wasn't really smart, nor was I really pretty. I had no visible talents to speak of, so it was very difficult for me to make friends. So even though I acted happy and cheerful, inside I was sad, alone, depressed. I often wondered why I wasn't good enough, why I wasn't acceptable, why I wasn't loved.
As an adult, I have experienced days of darkness hovering over me. There have been times I have made choices I have come to regret. There have been times I allowed my insecurities to take control, convincing me for the millionth time that I wasn't good enough; I wasn't pretty enough; I didn't measure up to those around me. There have been times sin has taken control of my life, blocking the light of grace.
It comforts me to know that all throughout my life - each and every time I have faced the darkness, God has hovered above the darkness. He has been right there watching over me, seeing the formless empty darkness that spread deep into the recesses of my soul.
"And God said 'Let there be light' and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness." Genesis 1: 3,4
Just as God spoke to the darkness hovering over the waters and brought the earth into light, God spoke to the darkness in my soul and brought me into the light. He lifted me from my dark pits of despair and allowed me to see the light of His love and grace. He separated my darkness with His light.
Notice God did not destroy the darkness. He did not banish it completely. He separated it by the power of His Word. Just as God separated the light of the day from the darkness of the night, He separated my darkness of fear, unworthiness, and unloveableness with His strength, His worth, and His love.
Throughout life I will still experience times of darkness. I will still experience times of fear. I will still experience times of loss. There will still be times that the scared little girl will have to face the darkness. And each time, God will still speak and at His Word, there will be light. So no matter what I face, no matter how difficult the situation, no matter how hurt or afraid, I will have the power of Gods light to separate me from the darkness.
Just Believe
When you start the journey called life
You're not promised days without strife.
You're only promised that each day
They'll be a hand to guide you along the way.
You are not promised ease from the start
You are only promised love in the heart.
You are not promised happy days on end
You are only promised joy from within.
Times of trouble you will face
As you run lifes awesome race.
But if you put your faith in The One that is true
You will find life is good to you.
So when you struggle with doubt and fear
Remember, there is One who is always near.
He is listening to your every sigh
And is prepared to give you wings to fly.
So if you stumble and start to fall
Let your voice make that important call.
Know there is a safe place to land
Reach out and take the Masters Hand.
There is nothing else you need to do
Just call out, He'll answer you.
To live a life of joy and peace
All you need to do is Just Believe.
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